Amway is an addiction, claims this forlorn fiance.
He missed their wedding shower to go to an Amway conference.
When forced to choose between his future bride and Amway, he chose Amway… despite the fact that, in 2 years, he has no downline and only one customer: his mother.
Is it possible that the Amway multilevel marketing “cult” can be as addictive as gambling, alcohol or drugs?
Share your opinion or experience below.
Here is the account we received from a forlorn fiance, who wishes to remain anonymous:
“Up until two days ago I was engaged to the man of my dreams. We had great plans for the future…for us…for a family. He had always been in Amway and he never actually worked at it until I pushed him to do it. I told him that if he was going to do it he should do it 100% or he would never see a profit, because he wasn’t seeing one. I challenged him that if he didn’t make a profit or see any prospect that he should quit or drastically cut back on the money he wasted on it. He agreed. Time came…no profit…he didn’t keep his promise.
“Lately, he became more and more distant from me. He wasn’t even himself anymore. He was hiding things from me and I knew he wasn’t happy but he could never put into words why. It was very comparable to someone addicted to drugs and hiding it from their loved ones. I comfronted him about my fears and he only shut me out. He turned me into his enemy. Everything I said was against him and against amway in his opinion. Every decision he made was based on amway instead of based on us.
“One night it got very bad and he randomly stated that he had bought tickets for an amway conference the day of our bridal shower. I know boys don’t usually go to the shower, but he had already promised me he would be there to help clean up afterwards and go through everything with me. I was excited. I knew there was a conference that day, but he promised me he would be there for me. He went behind my back and bought a ticket anyways. I explained to him that it was very hurtful and there would be other conferences, but only one memory of our shower celebrating us.
“He looked me straight in the face without any emotion and said he cared more about amway than he did my feelings.
“Now he says he can’t remember saying it, but he knows he did. This is the kind of mentality and addiction it has become for him. He regrets this action now, but he knows it isn’t exactly something you can just take back. He is sick…just like someone addicted to drugs. Only I don’t know how to help him with this addiction. We couldn’t even go on one date without him trying to contact our waitress/waitor. It consumed his every though like a crack addict desiring one more hit and doing anything to get it.
“I wanted to believe that amway was safe and it could be done in moderation. Hey, I liked the idea of retiring young too. I was there for him and supported him through it all. Now I see that it isn’t right. A half lie is still a lie and amway cannot be done in moderation. A gambler can’t just gamble a “little.”
“At this point I wouldn’t care if amway were possible and being a millionaire was only one contact away. I would rather be homeless than a millionaire and see someone I love so sick and not be able to help them.
“This is the result of amway in my life. I have to watch someone I love deeply be consumed by it and addicted to it and make nothing from it. I fear he will be like that for the rest of his life. It will never be enough. He will always need one more customer, one more prospect.
“He has been in amway 2 years…has no people under him…and no customers but himself and his mother when she can afford it. He did everything they asked, went to the meetings, listened to the cd’s, went out 3.4.5.6.even 7 times a week to contact.
“I even would take him back after everything if he could just give amway up. I tried to be reasonable and accomodating and let him do it as he pleased in moderation. All things in moderation…anything good can be bad if it consumes your life right? Well you can’t do amway in moderation that is what the cd’s and everything teaches…every person you meet is a potential client.
“I would do anything to have the real him back. I know what he said was hurtful, but I also know that it is the addiction talking, but he wont quit.
“I am afraid he will never see the light that it isn’t worth this. He is giving up his fiance and who is to say what is next. His friends…whom he has already lost many…his job as an accountant….his family?”
WHAT DO YOU THINK? HAVE YOU KNOWN ANYONE WHOSE RELATIONSHIPS CHANGED AFTER THEY GOT INVOLVED WITH AMWAY OR OTHER CULTLIKE MLM ORGANIZATIONS? SHARE A COMMENT BELOW.
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I, too have a boyfriend that I think addicted to the motto of quick buck. At first, I of course support him. He choose to work part time and using his spare time to do contacting. We've been living together for 9 months, 8 of which I let him free loading. Last month I got quite fed up, so I asked him to start to share the rent. He did share august rent, but this past two days he's been telling me that he decided to move back to his mom house in order to save some money as he had dental and credit debt. Looking back, I'm positive he's been "wasting" about $2000 for these mlm business. First one is ACN, which he paid $500 for start up fee, then he bought a home phone line and paid $35 monthly. Then he quit and start in amway, his start up fee is $260, plus each month he spend more than $200 to buy their products in order to keep up with their PV/BV points. Not to mention the money he spend on meetings, conventions, books and CDs. And now he's into another mlm company which I'm not really care whats their name is. All those time, he mostly broke. Heck, he doesn't even have money to do laundry! I becoming his bank, I feed him, providing him with the basic daily necessities. I feels like I really wanna break up with him ASAP!!
I was in Amway back in the days when it was Quixtar. Not every part of it was bad, but after nearly 3 years or people getting in and out I had enough.
I am not saying that me failing was anyone's fault other than mine and I swore I would never speak wrongly about Amway. It wasn't until I was married and we had our 3rd child that it came back into my life. My husband got very excited about the opportunity and I did too; seeing him so excited. It wasn't until I got pregnant with our 4th child about a year later that it started sucking the life right out of our marriage.
The rare date nights we had became going to meetings and listening to people talk and share the plan. He reluctantly backed off for awhile to help me out with the kiddos, but now it's starting again. I had hoped that he would just walk away from it, but the whole time he was listening to Amway cds and he began to start the brainwash cycle. I just want my husband back!
I told him how I feel for the umpteenth time yesterday and once more it fell on deaf ears. I am apparently the problem, not Amway. And when I told him I can't do this anymore, his response? "I'm sorry you feel that way" and he was off to a meeting.
Is there really any way to reason with someone who's been brainwashed by Amway before they burn out and lose everything like I did? He is willing to risk it all, because to him, I am the problem. Amway (even tho it's killing our marriage) is the answer. Still. Help???
Amway isn't the problem in any of these situation! The men you are describing are missing something in there life that Amway is filling the void or giving the hope to fill the void. In most cases money is what pulls people in and that's what most people chase to fill. There are millions of Amway IBO's and a very small percent make it to the top $220 per year is the average income I think? But how many of you work at a 9-5pm job that your boss tells you if you work hard and let nothing stand in the way of your dreams you'll be making 1,2,5! Million Dollars!? It doesn't happen that is the hope so many people hold on to. Its not Amway's fault they have proven success!? Talking about it won't make it better and I'm sorry to those that lost someone to it but the person you lost would have fallen to another dream somewhere else had it not been for amway.
Derek:
You are right that people who sell Amway have something wrong with them, that they are trying to fill some desperate need and fill some hole in themselves. But Amway and its tool sellers have created empires by exploiting impressionable, weak-minded individuals who are susceptible to self-delusion.
How is this different than a drug dealer? Sure, drug dealers don't create poverty and hopelessness, and they didn't create the genes that make some people prone to addiction. But do you believe that those who make their fortunes exploiting and encouraging the weaknesses of others don't deserve to be outed as the scumbags they truly are? Don't defwend people who take luxury vacations, drive expensive cars and live in McMansions by sucking the funds out of families and causing divorces and other devastation.
There are people who dedicate their lives to helping people and making the world a better place, and there are those who make money deluding suckers and adding to the misery of the worlds. What Amway and Amway tool sellers do might not be strictly illegal, but it is scumbaggery of the highest degree.
My wife has been doing ACN for nearly four years now. I'm a disabled Marine Veteran of 26 years service. I can't work now and that bothers me to no end. My wife has fallen into this ACN dreamscape and blasts off for destinations unknown everyday.
She chases people all over the country in search for the one who will bring her to TC,RD,RVP,SVP. I would rather be in Iraq, Bagdad, Afganistan, etc. Our quality time together is zero and the things we use to do are a thing of the past.
My retired pay, VA pay, SSDI, and Combat Special pay, funds her venture. I love to see her happy however, she's most happy with her ACN friends. I decided to help her by presenting the business where you speak in front of people. This is very easy for me and hard for others and seems to be a common thread to male it to the top.
I have integrity and if this business was completely legit, I'd support it. Her check in the mail is not enough to even pay her fuel for the month. Residual Income made by recruiting others into the dream of fortune and walking across the stage.
That's the cult part of it and frankly, she's all -in as they say at the meetings. Well, this Marine stil has gas in the tank, makes 8k a month and is packing his sea bag.
She can have
ACN because, she chooses to do the same over us. She's very pretty (no really) a solid ninety-nine and she always buys things to keep herself that way. The boobs,nails, face, rocket hard rear-end at the club, new car, and more.
I owe nothing on this home and don't care to walk away after thirty years come July first. I'm 52 and tested last month to be in my thirties. Gym rat and climbing out of being neglected through the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ. I run with pain, lift weights, and cycle until exhaustion.
Through it all, the Lord has sustained me. Today is Sunday, I missed Mass. My wife, gone to another appointment, When does this stop? I was supposed to die before I considered leaving my bride. I'm going to have to answer to God for this. ACN is doing well and I applaud their efforts. Good for them.
This life is not for me and The end is near. All the riches in this earthly life can't compare to a life filled with happiness and being together. Take your Amways, ACNS, and every other misleading endeavor and be gone.
Want adventure, compassion, devotion, love, desire, and happiness? Don't fall victim to these MLM dream killers. Only a select few ever make it and the rest are left with a void they never can fill. Too bad, what they seek is right at home.
Um...Hi. I am actually the "forlorn fiance" that wrote the account of losing my fiance to amway. I am not sure why but it has been over a year and I just started thinking about when this all happened. I guess I still have healing scars from the whole amway experience in my life. I do not know if anyone even reads this comment section or keeps up with it anymore. I actually re-read the account that I had wrote about my brainwashed fiance and I had to chuckle to myself. I had written "what is next" wondering if he would lose more friends and lose his accounting job. Well...guess what, he actually got fired from his accounting job. Unknown to me he got fired from his steady paying job within the same week I officially ended things with him. It kinda makes me laugh and want to say "I told you so", but it also makes me really sad to know how deep into the dark pit he truly was and as far as I know probably is...Of course he never told me he was fired, I actually found out from a co-worker of mine whose husband works for the same company my fiance did.
I haven't actually looked at this page since I wrote that. I'm not sure why it popped into my head today, but reading some of these comments on here made me close to tears.
I KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURTS! Trust me I do know, and it still hurts at times, but to all the fiances and girlfriends and boyfriends and just plain old friends of amway brainwashed people...all I would tell you is just LEAVE.
I know it will hurt like hell. Breaking up with my fiance was probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. Having to accept the embarrassment of ending and engagement, having to somehow survive the awkward encounters of people asking how married life is and tell them the truth and try to escape with some amount of dignity. Trust me this crap still happens over a year later and it SUCKS! Having to cancel reservations and deal with all the practicalities of ending and engagement. And even more so the broken heart and feeling of wasting your life being with someone who cared more about amway and money than he ever cared about you.
Just do it though! I am telling you take the very first opportunity to end things and end it! It is not worth wasting your time trying to explain to them the reality of how they are making you feel or the reality of all the money they are wasting. It is not worth blaming yourself for this situation. It is not worth spending one more second in a relationship with someone who cares more about money than you. And frankly that is what it boils down to...MONEY. They try to disguise it as caring about a dream and a lifestyle and it is complete bull crap. DO NOT BUY IT! It is not worth your heartache and your pain just leave and never go back to them. Never date or get involved with anyone who is seriously involved with amway or scams similar. If they are already in too deep to get out then just leave them...flat out just leave them.
If someone you know is considering this STRONGLY advice them NOT to do it!!!!!! Seriously I beg you.
Ending that relationship like I said was very very difficult for me, but I do not regret it at all. I couldn't imagine what it would be like if I would have gone through with the marriage. It would be awful and I would be miserable and always second place to his first love...amway. That is just not right. I do not regret it at all and I have a much much much much happier life now. I seriously cannot stress this enough.
So ladies of "ambots" just get out! It will hurt, but you will not regret it and your life will be so much happier and less of a battle. Quit contemplating trying to save them...in my experience you can't. They are not worth it in the end...and trust me I thought they we're too. But if popular belief is correct, you only live once and why should you waste any of your precious time miserable trying to save an "ambot".
And you know what even if by some miracle they do accomplish their goal...and trust me it would take a miracle...it will not be worth all the pain and suffering. And in the end you will probably end up just having resentment for how horrible they treated you and being rich is not worth that. Money is not everything.
Wow that was a lot bigger rant than I anticipated it would be I am sorry. I just read all these comments of broken relationships and was very sad for all you people out there. I am sorry. Just get out.
I hate to bash someone for their beliefs, but my husband (newely wed at the time 2003-4) is joined quixar. Although I was happy to see him come out of his shell. He started alienating our friends and family.
I remember he tried to get me on board, and I kept saying I had a bad feeling about it. It didn't seem right. It was to good to be true. I had two jobs, at the time and he was trying to get me to quit them and do his business with him. I found money missing out of our accounts that was for bills. To find out he was spending them on c.d's and seminars. I never saw any of the so called checks he was getting. This caused such a strain on our marriage I didnt want to come home at night.
Finally one day he asked me to go with him to a lunch date with 3 other members of this group, but promised me it wasnt about his business. I went I asked him to drive, but he insisted we ride with someone. I get there to some random house. Average house, nothing fancy like they promise. I walk in. My anxiety and anger are already at a high. Before I even sit down this older man and woman have a tripod out and a blank board. Before even introducing themselves to me they ask me what my goals in life are. I shoot my husband a look. I am holding back tears.
I tell them that I was informed this was a lunch, not about quixar, They laugh at me and ask me what I think makes a marriage? How we support one another. How I am wrong. My thinking is wrong. I explain I am a caregiver, I help people, even with a mound of money I will continue to work its what i like doing, alienating people is not ok. I feel like life is more then the materialistic things these people are selling to me just seems wrong.
I sit through the bullying. When we leave I don't say a word. I start questioning my life, my marriage (mind you I am 18 at the time) My husband and I almost divorced over it. He spent thousands of dollars on it. I literally had to move over two hours away. It took 6 months for us to work on our relationship. When I left they continued to feed him stuff about how if I loved him I would support him. It took 6 months for him to realize they were not good people.
I'm sure some people can do it. But for us it was a horrible experience. My husband and I have been pretty happy together minus the crazy cult that was quixtar. It has been 8 years since then. I don't know what finally pushed him to quit and move up with me. I had divorce papers ready. I know on some of the social networking sites I see one of the people that had recruited him. I don't speak to them I have no reason. I will be respectful but I never go out of my way.
I would like to say though that person that was on their way to making "6 figures" has had 5 different jobs since and currently is a assistant manager at a buffalo wing place. I am not going to shoot him down on purpose but I thought he was never going to work again.
Again it might work for some people hey it strengthened my marriage in the long run.
I really hope people see this post. Anyone that says Amway is a cult or a scan simply doesn't know a thing about Amway. I can literally write pages of why Amway is an amazing corporation, but I would be wasting my time. The only thing I can say is that people don't realize that this isn't just about Amway, this is a revolutionary industry that works!! It's proven that it works, for people who are commited, people who actually do the work. It is so simple, for anyone complaining about losing their fiancé or what not, guys seriously, it's not Amway, it's the way both of you think. That's the obvious reason why people fail at amway, people think too small. Life is about thinking BIG and Amway is just a vehicle with amazing products that give you the opportunity to reach your goals and dreams. Best of luck everyone.
Jay, you couldn't possibly be more wrong.
After a decade of never missing a single meeting in Amway (which I capitalize only because the Am- actually stands for the word American), and blowing around $50k on overpriced products and motivational tapes & conferences, I still astound people by saying it was worth it. The reason is (a) thinking and speaking positive things to yourself and looking on the bright side habitually really isn't a bad idea compared to its alternative; (b) I learned people skills that are absolutely second to none, because you have to face your fear of people to contact them about this crap and care about their (unlikely yet hopeful) success more than about your looking like a fool, and (b) my wife and I learned that we can stay together. We would have definitely fought ourselves to separation long ago were it not for being forced to work out our differences in time for "the meeting". Being around so many committed, loving couples all the time was a huge benefit for us. I know, weird, huh? I could've quit five years earlier, but hey, live and learn. They never tell you, less than 1% of people in any MLM ever break even.